Yes!! I will!!

So, the kids are with their dad for spring break this week. We dropped them off to him on Friday, had a wonderful evening in with home cooked salmon and broccoli for dinner, and enjoyed a quiet evening. The next day we headed to New Smyrna Beach for our weekend get away. My spring break was a few weeks ago, so this really is the only break I get from it all. Of course I have a microbiology exam Tuesday and two papers due in a week, but that's a whole different story.

So we get here (lilies that he bought me in tow, I couldn't possibly leave them at home!) and go walking on the beach. It was so beautiful. There were dolphins swimming so close to shore we could almost touch them, and pelicans flying over head. It was a little chilly, and the water was too cold to swim in, but it was still beautiful. I found several awesome finds of shells for my kids too!!

He asked that I bring something for a nice dinner, so I packed black strap heels and a new black dress he bought just for the occassion, so we went back to the hotel and got ready for dinner. Driving out to dinner, he stops by the Ponce Inlet lighthouse. It's dark outside and the lighthouse is all lit up, it was just beautiful. He gets down on one knee, opens a little black box, and proposes!! Of course I said yes!!

More to follow, off to climb a lighthouse!!

It's Been How Long?

okay, so I am a total slacker. Let's just say that life + midwifery school = misty's butt being kicked. Not only have we been sick (and I mean *SICK*) three (going on FOUR now that Bobby has a fever and belly ache tonight) times in the two semesters I've been at FSTM, but I also attempted to apprentice in Sarasota again, which turned out to be way too much for my family to handle, and I started a job birth assisting with a local midwife, and there is that addition of a boyfriend (and two dogs) to the equation. Soooo.... I've neglected almost everything else in my life. My blog (so sorry), my written journals (how sad!), my friends (I miss you guys!), and sometimes even sleep (welcome to my life). What's the big news this semester? I might fail my first class *EVER*! W-T-F? Yeah, so that sucks. Turns out microbiology is kicking my butt. But at least it isn't kicking only my butt. Pretty much the whole class is failing. Defect on my part? I think not. We'll see how final grades turn out.

So this week is spring break. I am using my time with cleaning, and playing. I should be studying that awful microbiology. But I'm not - yet. As I sit here typing and trying to keep my eyes open, Jereme is telling me to save and shut down to go to sleep LOL! Anyway, guess I better wrap up this update, probably won't write another one for a long time once again :( Maybe I will. Who knows. If I could get my phone set back up to mobile blogger, then I would update more often. Will have to fiddle with it.

When Harry Met Sally

Or Rather..When Jereme Met Misty: the beginning

I was given some birthday money this year, and so I decided to make the most of it. The week of my birthday I received an email from eHarmony letting me know that they had a special going on, 4 months for the price of one. I had gotten so many "matches" on eHarmony (but of course, could not communicate with any of them except during free communication weekends) that I decided to go on and put my birthday money into four months of eHarmony. A week after I signed up for a full account I was matched up with several people and communicated with a handful of them, including Jereme. At first I was unsure, as I had been weeding out all military from my matches (no offense to our nation's military, I just didn't think my life would easily match a man who had to deploy often) but I noticed we had a lot in common, and was impressed with how important family seemed to be to him. We made it to email communication and he asked me to meet him for coffee. I asked him how he felt about kids, and he replied that he was apprehensive about it. Well, I figured, I might as well meet him for coffee but I bet nothing will come of it since he seems to not like the idea of being a step father.

I set up to meet him for coffee on a Thursday, and I arrived a bit early. I sat at the coffee shop and fiddled with my phone, texting one of my friends while trying not to become nervous about meeting someone basically blindly off the internet. a few minutes after I arrived, I spotted him. At first I thought, is that really him? It didn't really look like him in his picture...but then I'm pretty bad at remembering names and faces and thought maybe I was just remembering wrong. Well, he's wearing the same color clothes he said he'd wear so it must be him. I waited for him to approach me, which he did, nervously. He sat down and we started talking, I think about work first, and then Church, and then we broached the subject of my kids. We had been there for over an hour when I decided I really wanted to go walking outside, it was such a beautiful day. I asked if he'd mind joining me, and he of course wanted to. We walked around until the very last moment I could stay before I had to get my kids. We could talk so easily, and I was so comfortable with him right from the beginning. He said he'd like to see me again, and asked for my phone number. We exchanged numbers and I hurried home, giddy with excitement over this sweet many I met.

A few days later he called me, and I tried to act as if I wasn't ecstatic to get his phone call, so I let it go to voicemail the first time, and I called him back a little while later. We talked that night until both of our phones went dead, about everything in our lives. We also set up to see each other again, Wednesday night after school.

So, Wednesday night after school I met him at Oviedo Marketplace and we went to Chili's for dinner. After dinner we walked around for awhile talking, but ended up deciding to drive around as it was dark out and there wasn't much to walk around. After hours of driving and talking, we decided to head to City Walk so we could walk around again. We dropped my van off at my house and he drove us out to City Walk. We stayed there until they closed, and then decided to go to Steak and Shake after ice cream. When we got there and I was sitting down, I finally started winding down and becoming tired. We left to take me home, and ended up sitting in his truck in front of my house for another hour or so just trying to say goodbye. This was the first time we had any contact, when he reached over to hold my hand. I was walking on clouds. He asked to see me again, and I said we could see each other Friday, but it ended up being a drill weekend, and so we went out again Monday during the school day.

That Monday we went to Moss park for a picnic and day hike. We spent all this time talking more and getting to know each other better. It was at Moss park that he kissed me the first time. I was pretty nervous at this time, wondering what I was getting myself into. Was I ready for this again? Was I ready to have my heart broken again? Was it worth the risk of a broken heart to find out if it would end happily ever after instead? I decided to go with the flow, and try to relax. I had such a good time, and was living in the moment. He asked when he could see me again, and I told him we could go out Wednesday after school. He invited me to his place, but I was hesitant, I told him we should go out somewhere instead.

By Wednesday, however, he had convinced me to come to his place. So, I did. I had such a great time at his place, and ended up spending the night. A week after this he met my kids, and has been around all the time since then. When I'm home and he's home, we're together. My kids adore him, and he is great with my kids. My family all love him, and most importantly, I am completely in love with him. I have never felt like this before, and I'm so glad that I put myself out there again. My life is truly blessed.

Ready or Not, Here We Go!

So many things to update, I have gotten so behind on my blog. I completed my first term at FSTM successfully with a fairly decent GPA, and I am content with that. This week I start Year 1 Term 2, and my apprenticeship is once again underway. I am excited to be moving along in this journey!!

We went to get our stuff from Tennessee a few weeks ago. Though we didn't fit it all in the trailer we did get most of the big stuff. My boys are now sleeping in their own beds and we have places to put all the clothes!! I am happy to have most of our stuff here, but feeling overwhelmed with a lack of space to put it all. I am in the process of downsizing and minimizing, and have a feeling a garage sale is in my near future.

We went to Ohio for Christmas, the weather was very cold and snowy but we had a good time. My children were of course spoiled, though more spoiled by Jereme than by my family this year.

Speaking of Jereme, so now we've been dating nearly 4 months, I can't believe it. I went ahead and canceled my eHarmony account, as I don't think I am going to need that anymore.

What Misty Found

Back in March I took a risk. I put what I want out there, in my prayers, spoke it out loud to the universe, and posted it here on my blog. I was in a different place then. A place of disappointment, of heartbreak, of irreconcilable differences. But I put it out there anyway. And then, when I felt I was ready, I put myself out there too. Sheltering my fragile heart, fearing it would be broken again, but knowing that I am called to be a companion to someone, to be a wife. I put myself out there, and here is what I found.

I found that I can still love passionately, and found someone who loves me equally passionately. I found happiness, a real, whole, and complete happiness. I found understanding and an opportunity to understand in return. I found myself loved and not judged. I found an amazing male role model for my boys and the possibilities of a healthy marriage in the future for my daughter to be molded by. I found someone I can respect, and who respects me. I found someone who finds passion in his life. Someone who cherishes me. Someone who happily sits between two of my kids at Mass so that there is an adult separating all three. Someone who goes to Mass with me whenever I want to, even if its not a Sunday or Holy day of Obligation. Someone who will be my pillar of strength when I feel I haven't a shred of my own left. Someone who does make me laugh when I'm crying, and who can cool my hot anger with the slightest touch. Someone who has accepted my children with open arms, and loves the individuals they are. Someone who is open to life. Someone who is stable in his own life. Someone who can stand the life of a midwife (well this is yet to be tested LOL!). Someone with patience to match my own. Someone who thinks he can share me, happily, with the whole village of women, children, and families who I live and breathe to serve on a day to day basis. Someone who respects my dreams and ambitions for my future.

In March I wondered if that someone even existed. I wondered if it might just be too much to ask. But I knew that it was what I wanted, so I put it out there. And it's exactly what I found.
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Midterm

Well here I am, nearly mid semester at FSTM. I am really enjoying myself (for the most part) in class, despite the fact that a lot of it is review for me. I enjoy the atmosphere I am surrounded by (mostly) while at school, and I have begun to even enjoy my overnights in Gainesville (it almost feels like a slumber party every week!)

I am dealing with other stuff outside of school, but I'd rather not talk about any of that today. I haven't been keeping up with my blog as much as I would like to, and I really hope to be able to change that here in the near future, as I get my new groove on.

My daughter has her First Reconciliation coming up next month, she is very excited and moving right along to have her First Communion next May! My big girl!! I also got her a new bed and desk (it is a loft bed) and a mattress that is just heavenly, I wish I could sleep on it every night!! I will likely buy my boys each the same mattress as well, I am very pleased with that purchase.

More big news....My boys have their own bedroom now!! For the first time since I threw my exhusband out, we are using two bedrooms!! My boys are in one room and my daughter and I are in another room!! This is really a huge, life changing thing for us!! I will be sleeping in a bed again soon, thanks to one of my good friends who is giving me a full bed!! Yay!!

Also in the news for me, I just had a birthday!! It was threatening to turn into a depressing weekend for me, but alas my BFF pulled through for me! He treated me to Ruby Tuesday's for dinner, and then we stayed up late watching movies and snuggling on the couch like we used to in high school!! oooh the memories LOL! My children also had a little party for me, it was very sweet, and my brother gave me an organically grown, whole, dried out loofah squash (he grew them himself) now I can make tons of loofahs for myself, and I have a zillion seeds to plant my own next spring!! yay!!

Also on the "news" front, I made another appointment with Tanya Kell (our homeopath) and she has prescribed my daughter and my youngest son constitutionals, I will be ordering those this week and hoping that they help with some issues (including Tori's sensitive stomach and Bobby's awful allergies!) I love our homeopath so much, she asked about me first and gave me another remedy for myself before even moving on to the kids (which was who the appointment was for!!) If you are in need of a homeopath, I recommend her highly!! She also does phone consults (not just in person) so even though she is in Nashville, you can have appointments with her if you aren't!! www.tanyakell.com

I am going up to TN/AL in a few weeks both to get the rest of my stuff from there and also to go to a little bit of the MANA conference, including (hopefully!) the ROAST of the farm midwives!! FUN!!

Its Official!!!!!!

I am officially enrolled at Florida School of Traditional Midwifery as of TODAY!!!! That's right, you heard it here first folks, Misty has reached a *huge* (and I mean *HUGE*) milestone in her journey to becoming a midwife!! Nearly 4 years ago when I first decided to start this journey, going to a Florida school seemed so out of reach, and now here I am!!

So, you might be thinking to yourself, what classes does Misty get to take this semester? Here's the list of courses!!

Year 1, Term 1

• Student Success Lab
• Healthcare Skills I
• Psychology for Midwives
• Research Evaluation
• HIV/AIDS
• History of Midwifery
• Anatomy and Physiology I
• Anatomy and Physiology I Lab
• Interpersonal Relationships and Communication Skills I

With my already 3 years of midwifery studies behind me, and recent college as well, this semester should be a breeze. My goal is to get straight A's (Like I've ever gotten anything OTHER than straight A's?)

I have my doula/CBE prerequisites classes this weekend in Ocala, and then I start school on the 30th of August! I can't believe it!! I am still sort of in awe of it all.

So Much To Do, So Little Time

Registering children for public school in Florida is so much more complicated than it was in Tennessee. I have to fill out what seems like 30 papers for each child, and each paper seems to want the same information. To make matters worse, I needed a lease agreement and my drivers license changed over. Man what a pain. My goal is to have the children all registered by tomorrow. Here's hoping. I especially am fretting about registering them because Tommy should be skipping a grade this year. We shall see.

Organizing my Life

If you know me, you know that I cannot thrive in chaos. Right now my life is chaos. We are living in a limbo that is not quite Tennessee, not quite Florida, and will remain that way for at least another month. My father did not prepare his house for our arrival, and so the house here is in its own little state of chaos. Preparing to return to school myself is also chaotic, as I wonder how it will actually work out. I am taking it one baby step at a time. Organizing one little thing at a time. Everything will only get better from here.


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Hope, Love and Prayer

Hope

My hope lives in my childrens eyes. It is given life by the smiles and giggles that surround my day. My hope lives within me, all around me. I find hope in the rain storms, in the waves at the beach, in the text messages from friends at just the right time. My hope lives on when nothing else seems to. It is a constant. A forever. My hope keeps my dreams alive.

Love

I used to think I could never have enough love to give to more than one child. And then I had a second child. It seems that with the more children you have, the more your love grows, and the more of it you have to give. Love multiplies with use, much like smiles are contagious. My life, and my children, and my work are all loves of my life. My love continues to grow as time and life go on.

Prayer

Prayer is such a gift. A direct connection to God. Prayer surrounds my day. Prayer is trusting God, and placing my life in His hands. It's admitting that it's bigger than me. That I don't know what to do, nor how to do it. It's letting Him take the problem or issue or challenge out of my hands and into His own. It's admission. It's submission. It's my secret weapon, tucked gently in my back pocket. There to help when faced with an overwhelming world of darkness, sadness, and hoplessness so thick it threatens to destroy the hope in my world like a black hole.

Nearer the End than the Beginning

All things have a beginning and an end. Several things in my life right now are nearer the end than the beginning. My time in Tennessee/Alabama (at least, this time) is nearer the end than the beginning. My (and the kids!) summer is nearer the end than the beginning. My midwifery training is nearer the end than the beginning (though it might not seem so to some, as I have three more years to go, I still feel nearer the end than the beginning...I have learned so much already). Now that my oldest son has turned that magical age of 9 years old I am now nearer the end than the beginning of his childhood and my role as supervising parent for him. Yes he and I still have 8 years and 11 months where he is still the "child" and I am still supervising him...but I can't believe half of my work with him is almost over :(

This summer I accomplished some things that I wanted to. First, I took my children to meet their great-grandma McGovern and see New Jersey, where their grandpa McGovern is from. While there we spent a lot of time with their aunts, uncles, and cousins that they wouldn't have known otherwise. We also had a special treat....we went to see the statue of Liberty!! Well, we saw her from afar...but it was better than not at all!! My father in law says if we come up to New Jersey again to see family that perhaps we will try to spend the better part of a day and go into the Statue of Liberty. I know that *I* will love that, and I think my kiddos will too!!

We also came to Ohio to spend time with my grandparents and cousins here. This is always a special time for everyone and I am so glad that I was able to do it again this year for and with my children. Next year will probably be a little less likely as I will have school all summer, but we will see.

The move back to Florida is proving to be very stressful for me, and I am trying to spend the least amount of time as possible thinking about it. While we were in New Jersey it was hard for me *not* to think about Tom, and everything that has happened in my life the last 9 years, because his family (though all very apologetic - as if his behavior is somehow their fault...which it isn't) either brought it up frequently, or just reminded me of him by simply being around them. Tom definitely has some physical features in common with the McGovern side of his family.

We're leaving Ohio soon, and I have a feeling my stress level will decrease once I get settled into new routines in Florida. Once the kids are registered for school (and me too for that matter!) and we're settled into our temporary living space (until I find something else).

I am also spending some time looking for a part time job. I am hoping to pick something up that will help me pay bills while I am in school. I have a goal to get rid of the van by July of 2011, and would love to see that actually happen. I am thinking about maybe getting a station wagon style car instead. Something that is better on gas, has a lower car payment, and isn't going to break down on me (hopefully!) every 10000 miles like this P.O.S. van has.

So, that is an update on me and the kids!